


Pushing Through

by LexieGreyShouldBeAlive (WritingCoffeeAddiction)



Series: Lexie's World [2]
Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Brain Surgery, Brain tumor, Cancer, Comfort, Developing Relationship, Drama, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Falling In Love, Family Drama, Fluff and Angst, Hospitalization, Hurt/Comfort, Major Illness, Male-Female Friendship, Multi, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Sister-Sister Relationship, drunken father
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-05-29
Packaged: 2018-11-06 15:04:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11038629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingCoffeeAddiction/pseuds/LexieGreyShouldBeAlive
Summary: Lexie's relationship with her half-sister, Meredith, is beginning to blossom after the diagnoses of her Medulloblastoma. Derek Shepherd is due to operate on her brain in just a short time, will that go smoothly? Or will complications ensue? To add onto that she's starting to have feelings for a certain Plastic Surgeon, Mark Sloan. (Sequel to Coming Together; Make sure to read that first.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own the show or characters. All I own is the story and writing.
> 
> (This is a sequel to Coming Together. Make sure to read that story first.)

Almost a month through treatments, Lexie Grey felt her body being drained of all her energy. She could barely get out of bed without feeling like she was on a moving boat in an ocean that had constantly been at high tide. And to make things even harder, her brain was due to be operated on in just another week. Thinking of someone cutting into her own head made her feel ill; she was supposed to be the surgeon, the one behind the scalpel. She was _not_ supposed to be the patient.

The only up-side to having found out about her brain tumor was gaining a relationship with her half sister. Meredith spent as much time as she could, sitting and visiting with Lexie. It wasn't too hard for her to drop by, seeing as she worked at the hospital and had been there everyday anyway. The two of them spent countless hours talking and learning more about one another.

* * *

Lexie's morning of radiation therapy was rough, but she only had to push through it for a few more days. Scans had shown that the size of her tumor had gone down quite a bit, meaning surgery to remove it would be much more successful. And that made her not loathe the treatment as much, because she knew it was working and soon she would be tumor free. By next month she might even be back to work. At least that's what she was hoping for; she couldn't stand to just lie in a hospital bed all day, it started to make her feel stir crazy.

Early afternoon, Lexie decided to try and take a walk down the hall. She needed to get out of that bed before she lost her mind. Carefully while holding onto the pole of her IV, the dark haired woman planted her feet on the ground and stood up. A tiny wave of nausea hit her, but she pushed past it and continued to complete what she'd set out to do. She slowly walked over to the door, opened it before making her way out through the hallway.

"What are you doing out of bed, Lex?" Meredith Grey's voice questioned as she quickly walked over to her. She was in the middle of her afternoon rounds, but seeing her sister not in her room had her very concerned. "You need to go back to your room, right now! You just had your radiation therapy, and I know how sick you feel after that. Walking around is only going to make you feel worse!" Meredith spoke sternly, grabbing her sister's hand, trying to lead her back to the room.

Lexie shook her head, pulling her sister to a stop and looked her right in the eye, "If I spend another minute in that damn room I'm going to lose my freaking mind! I'm feeling fine so let me walk. Walking is good, Mer; you should be encouraging that." Her tone on the brink of losing it; she really could not bare to stay in that room any longer. She missed getting to do her job. Taking care of patients and learning how to become a better surgeon was her passion, but now she was stuck being the patient. And that bothered her terribly.

Seeing how agitated her sister seemed to be getting, Meredith sighed and let go. She knew she was right; it was much better for patients to get out of bed everyday and walk, to prevent blood clots and anything else that could happen. "I know, Lexie. I know I should encourage you to keep walking, but you're my sister and I just can't bare to see you so ill! Though if you're not feeling too bad right now then definitely continue your walk. Just make sure not to overdo it! I'm done with my afternoon rounds in another hour so I'm gonna come check on you then. Be careful please, I love you," The dark blonde doctor spoke, pressing a motherly kiss to her sister's forehead. She gave her a quick hug and then reluctantly went to finish completing her rounds.

* * *

Once her sister left, Lexie continued to walk down the hallway. She didn't really know where she was walking to, but as long as she was out of that hospital room she could careless where she ended up. While on her walk she watched as the doctors (many whom she knew) and nurses were busy wheeling patients to the ORs or down for x-rays. It made her frown, because that's what she was supposed to be doing. It was her job to take care of other people, to fix whatever problems they may have. Why did things have to go south and result in her being one of those people who needed to have something fixed?

Doctor Mark Sloan held a steaming cup of coffee in his hand as he walked down the hallway. He was headed to find Derek, but when he saw Lexie walking in the other direction he turned to catch up with her. "Lexie, it's good to see you out of bed. How are you feeling? Ready for that nasty tumor to come out yet?" When he finally reached her, he smiled at her and pulled her in for a friendly hug. Ever since he found her lying on the floor, many weeks ago, he couldn't get her out of his mind. He knew he shouldn't be thinking such thoughts of her, especially when she had been suffering with cancer but he couldn't help himself. Lexie Grey was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. How could anyone come across someone like her and not have intimate thoughts?

Peering up at the other doctor, the rather handsome doctor, Lexie felt a smile spreading across her face. "I'm more than ready to have this abomination removed from my brain. I want to get back to my life, and continue working on becoming a surgeon. It really sucks being the patient!" She spoke while looking up at Mark's smoky blue eyes. Those eyes made her feel tingly inside, and had her smile grow in size. Sure her sister might have been married to Doctor McDreamy, but Mark Sloan wasn't far behind him. In fact, in Lexie's eyes, Mark Sloan was McDreamy because every time she looked at him, she felt butterflies fly around in her stomach. And it didn't help that he had been the one to find her, when her headache was so bad that she fell on the ground. No, that just made her like him even more.

"Pretty soon, you'll be back to doing what you love. Shepherd's the best neurosurgeon; he will get the entire tumor out and have you back to normal quicker than you think!" The dark blonde man stated, looking across at Lexie with a friendly and warm smile. He couldn't help but take in the natural beauty of her. Even with how sick she'd been, and the devastating effects of the treatment, he still found her to be one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. And if it hadn't been for her having a brain tumor, he would most definitely ask her on a date. But he couldn't do that, not when she was suffering through so much pain. He didn't want to add any more emotions or stress for her to deal with.

Smiling back, Lexie nodded. She longed for the day where she would no longer suffer those chronic headaches, and the awful radiation she had to be put through each morning. "You know, it's actually because of you that I've found the reason as to why I have had these terrible headaches for so long...If you hadn't helped me and took me to Doctor Shepherd, I might be dead right now. So thank you, Mark Sloan. You've kind of saved my life..." She slowly walked closer to where he stood and pulled him in for a friendly embrace. A way to show her appreciation for what he'd done. And to satisfy her need to have physical contact with him.

Surprised to have Lexie's delicate arms around him, Mark pulled her closer and relished in the moment they were sharing. "Well I'm glad I was able to find you and help you figure out why you were having headaches all the time. And I hope the two of us can be friends even after you're well. You're a very kind person, Lexie. You're also funny; I like people who are funny," He smiled down at her, not ready to let go of her yet. Her face glowed as she let out a laugh, a laugh that made Mark's heart skip a few beats. Her brown eyes, almost that of a Mocha, sparkled with a smile. And that only made him want to see her smile more; he wanted to see her happy, she looked even more beautiful when she was happy. Not paying attention to his actions, the plastic surgery attending inched his face closer to Lexie Grey's, so close that their lips brushed together. And again, they brushed together but longer and much more deeply.

When the two finally pulled apart, Lexie stood staring up at the man in astonishment. Sure she'd been kissed before, but never like what she just experienced. "Wow," she whispered, breathlessly, "That...That was one hell of a kiss!" Cupping Mark's face in her hands, she pressed another kiss to his lips and smiled. "You're an excellent kisser, Doctor Sloan...You made me forgot about my tumor! I haven't been able to forgot about that since the diagnoses, but when you kissed me all I could think of was how I've never felt anything like that!" Lexie felt much better about her decision to walk around the hall, and run into Mark. He made her heart flutter with joy, and even more when he kissed her.

"You're not bad yourself, little Grey," Mark grinned, pulling her into his arms and kissing her forehead. "I should probably take you back to your room so you can rest. Maybe we can finish this tonight; I'm off the clock around 7:30...I'll come see you after, if that's okay with you." Before she could protest, he lifted her into his arms and carried her back to the hospital room that she had spent the last month in. Gently, he laid her in the bed and reached down to kiss her cheek while stroking her hair. "Get some rest, Lexie. I've gotta get back to work before the chief finds me and kills me! See you this evening."

* * *

Derek Shepherd was busy looking over recent scans that he took of Lexie's brain when he saw his best friend come running towards him. Looking up from his computer screen, he turned to Mark. "What are you so happy about, Sloan?" He questioned, seeing the ridiculously huge smile on his face. He grabbed his half-full coffee mug and took a sip while waiting to hear the other's response. It wasn't often he had seen his friend that happy.

Mark's smile only grew as he approached where Doctor Shepherd was standing, "I ran into Lexie on my way down here... We kind of kissed each other, and it was amazing! Well I mean we didn't start off by kissing each other, we were talking and I just - I couldn't help myself. She's so beautiful and her eyes, they're so warm and welcoming. I tried to talk myself out of kissing her, because she's sick and shouldn't be worrying about things like that...but I couldn't help myself! And she seemed to enjoy it herself, so no harm done. Right?" He anxiously glanced at the other, wondering how he would feel about the situation.

Nearly choking on his coffee, Derek turned away from the computer to stare at his best friend. "You kissed Lexie?!" He wasn't really shocked, but he was a bit surprised to hear that. He didn't think that would be the best thing for Mark to do right now, when Lexie Grey was suffering with a serious illness...and also his patient. "You know Mer is gonna kill you when she finds out...She'll say you took advantage of her ill sister! Plus Lexie still has a long road ahead of her...and you probably made that a bit longer by kissing her. Because she's gonna expect you to be there with her now; she's not like other women you've slept with or kissed, she's Lexie Grey. She's not a one night stand, Mark; she's a relationship type of woman. So if you're going to kiss her, you better plan on sticking with her. I'll never hear the end of it if you don't!"

" _We_ kissed each other, Derek. I kissed her, she kissed me and we both really enjoyed it. And I do plan on staying with her, being there for her as she deals with this disease. Lexie is different, I know that, she's got a heart of gold and I would never be able to break it. Besides, I've seen the wrath of Meredith Grey and prefer to never witness that again!" Mark spoke, meaning every word that came out. Lexie Grey was indeed different than the other women he'd dated, and that made him want her even more.

* * *

At five o'clock that evening, Meredith finally finished the last of her rounds and decided to go get herself a coffee and one to bring to her sister. As much as she loved her job, sometimes she just needed a break. Seeing how sick these patients could be really tore at her emotions and made her heart burst with pain. Even more so now because her own sister was dealing with a very serious illness. An illness that may be fatal or may not, it all depended on if the radiation therapy had done it's job and shrunk the tumor. If it did, then her sister would live tumor free and get her life back...but if the therapy failed, she'd be lucky to have her sister for even one more year. And that thought hurt deep, because she spent most of her life hating Lexie. She didn't even give her a chance when they first met several months ago...those several months that she could have spent getting to know her sister. She could have formed a relationship with Lexie sooner, and maybe she could have helped her get diagnosed earlier.

Carrying two steaming cups of coffee, Meredith opened the door to her younger sister's room. She smiled softly when she saw Lexie sitting up in the chair, which was right beside the bed, and watching the TV. "You must be feeling better, Lex. And I'm glad," the dark blonde woman spoke, kissing the top of her head as she hand her one of the coffees, "I brought you a coffee. Figured you'd probably enjoy it. What have you been up to all day?"

Smiling happily, Lexie took the coffee and a big gulp out of it. "Heavenly," she said, enjoying the bold and creamy taste. "That was very sweet of you, Meredith. Thank you, I really needed a cup!" And she sure did need that cup; she hardly ever had coffee these past few weeks. She had a hard time drinking water, yet alone a cup of strong coffee. But now, she felt great and was easily able to drink a delicious cup of her favorite coffee. "Well I walked around the hallway for a little...and ran into Mark Sloan. He's such a kind man, and a really good friend. You know, he's the one who helped me the day I was diagnosed...I had a terrible headache that day and fell as I was walking to get a pain killer...I couldn't get up, my legs felt like noodles, and there he was...standing over me and helping me to stand. If it weren't for him, I might not even be here."

Hearing that only made the other feel guilty. She couldn't believe that she wasted so much time ignoring her own sister; her sister, who happened to be one of the sweetest and most caring people alive. Meredith sighed, placing a hand on Lexie's head and stroking it warmly, "I'm glad he was there to help you, Lex. I really am, and it makes me feel so bad that I wasn't. I chose to hate you for no reason. I should have been there for you and maybe, maybe you would have found out about the tumor sooner! I should have been a better sister to you, Lexie! I'm so sorry!" She cried out, setting her coffee aside and wrapping her arms tightly around the younger woman.

"Stop it, Meredith!" Lexie ordered softly, wrapping her own arms around her older sister. "You don't need to be sorry, and you don't need to feel bad about anything. Just because you hated me doesn't mean that that's the reason my tumor is here...and if you even think that, you need to have your own brain checked." She sighed sadly, and felt pain in her heart when she heard a quiet sob come out of the other. Hugging her sister closer, Lexie stroked her wavy hair gently. "Please don't cry, Mer...Please don't; you'll make me cry too," she whispered, kissing her head motherly.

Peering at the brunette, Meredith's face was covered in tears and her eyes were red and puffy. She squeezed her tight while stroking her back in gentle circles. "I do need to be sorry, Lexie! I've wasted so much time hating you when I had no reason to...I could have been getting to know you; we could have been working on our relationship...and now you could _die_! You might fucking die, Lexie, and I've only spent a month with you...not even! How can I _not_ be sorry? How can I not feel bad for not being here for you? You've felt alone for so long, and all I did was make you feel worse! And you're not even mad about what I've done...You're nothing like me, Lexie; you're a forgiving, sweet, and loving person. I'm a cold, grudge-holding, and angry person. But yet you still want to be my sister, you wanted so bad for me to accept that and all I wanted was for you to go away. Even after all I've put you through, you're still here with your welcoming heart. And I just - I want to be your older sister, I want to protect and take care of you...but I can't - It hurts knowing that I might lose you. I can't lose you, Lex, you're the only family I have left. I know I've got Derek, but you're my sister." Tears poured out of her eyes as she held the other close in her arms, rubbing her back soothingly.

The pain in her sister's voice brought tears to Lexie's eyes as well. She pulled her close, cupping Meredith's head in her hands, and looked into her blue eyes - that held strong pain in them - with empathy. She felt terribly awful for the older woman, she didn't want her to think so negatively. "You're not a cold or angry person, Meredith...Please don't think that. You're just more assertive than I am, and that's not a bad thing." Brushing a hand softly through the other's hair, Lexie frowned. "You are my sister, and no matter what you do I will always love you. You could kill me in my sleep and I would still love you. But, uh, please don't do that." She stroked her forehead comfortingly, holding her tight. It broke her heart to hear how upset her sister was about the possibility of her death. "I'm not going to die, Mer; I promise. I won't leave you, I know how much pain that would cause you and I don't want to cause you pain. And if it helps, if after my brain surgery I don't wake up, you can keep me plugged in for as long as you want. I don't think that's going to happen but if it does, you make whatever decision you need to. Whatever will cause you the least amount of pain. I love you so much, Mer, and I hate that I'm making you hurt so much. I wish I didn't have this damn tumor...it's hurting you as much as it's hurting me!" She spoke gently, trying to soothe her sister. She carefully placed Meredith's head near where her heart would be, hoping its beat would help to calm her down. "We'll be okay, Mer, I promise."

* * *

 

Mark Sloan walked into Lexie's hospital room at just ten after eight in the evening. He smiled when he saw that she was sleeping peacefully in the bed. Quietly he took a seat in the chair that was right next to her bed, and leaned down to kiss the top of her head softly. "Sloan," a voice from near the window spoke, nearly scaring him to death. He turned to where the voice came from and was a bit shocked to see Meredith sitting there, giving him an intense stare. "Oh, Meredith, hi. I didn't even notice you were over there. How are you?" He asked, his voice a tiny bit nervous as he didn't know if she'd seen the kiss he gave to her sister.

"Good, great," Meredith's tone not too friendly towards him as she give him the death stare. "You kissed my sister...just now. Is there a reason for that, Mark?" She knew she shouldn't be so hard on him, after what Lexie told her about how he was there when she was diagnosed. But still...Lexie was her sister, her _little_ sister. And she had the right to give the death stare to any man who looked at her sister in such a lustful way.

Gulping, Mark could only imagine the reaction she would have to their lip-smacking kiss in the hallway. He would be dead for sure when she finds out about that. "Well, uhm, I - she's my friend. I just - It was just a friendly gesture." He was lying, not about Lexie being his friend, but about the friendly gesture of kissing her forehead. That wasn't a friendly gesture, he knew, it was a sign of affection. He liked Lexie a lot, and cared for her a great deal. But telling her older sister that would like signing his own death warrant.

The blonde woman shook her head disapprovingly, knowing a lie when she heard one. "Lexie is my sister, Mark. If there is something going on between the two of you, I have the right to know about it. Now you can either tell me the truth, or you can leave and come back another day. The choice is yours." She said, not moving her eyes from his. She watched as he seemed to battle inside on what to say, waiting for an answer. Curiosity peaked as she longed to know what was going on between the two.

Mark knew that there was no way for him to get out of this without telling her what was happening. And he hoped Lexie wouldn't be mad that he was telling her sister. "Well...I ran into your sister earlier during her walk. We were talking and I kissed her, then she kissed me. And I want to be here for her, to help her through this illness that she's dealing with. I care about Lexie, I care about her a lot. She's something special; she really is and I can't stay away from her..." He braced himself for what Meredith would say or do. He wondered if she would be mad that he felt that way about her sister, or if she would be okay with it. Mark hoped it was the second choice.

"Lexie isn't a woman that you should toy around with, Sloan." Icy was the tone in Meredith's voice as she glared over at him, "Lexie is my younger sister, who has a heart the size of Jupiter and I swear to God if you break it, I'm gonna break you. I know how you are, Mark; we all do! You sleep around with women all the time, and don't even give a second thought. But you better not even think about doing that with my sister! If you want to kiss her and be intimate with her, then you have to stay with her. You can't just forget about Lexie, she's not the same. She's a lover, she won't fight you. She'll let you do whatever you want, because that's how fucking loyal she is! And if you ever take advantage of her loyalty, you will find yourself floating at the bottom of a river! Do you understand me, Sloan?!" When she received a nod in response to her question, she sighed. "Good. You better take wonderful care of my Lexie, Mark. I mean it. She's the sweetest and loving person you'll ever meet, so don't break her. Or, believe me, you'll be _very_ sorry."


	2. Chapter 2

Sitting in the bar, across from his best friend, Derek took a swig of his beer and laughed. "So you're telling me that Mer is really okay with you dating her sister? Her younger sister that has a serious brain tumor? The one that I'm operating on tomorrow night?" He laughed again, unable to believe that his wife would be so okay with such a predicament. Meredith never really cared for Mark Sloan, and hated the way he slept around with woman after woman. So to hear that she didn't seem to object to Mark's liking her sister a lot more than just a friend brought a bout of laughter to Derek Shepherd.

Sloan rolled his eyes while taking a sip of the beer in front of him. He knew his friend to always get a kick out of anything that he said or done. "Well I mean, after she threatened my life, she seemed to come to an acceptance of my feelings for Lexie. As long as I don't do anything to hurt Lex, than Meredith is okay with it...and will spare me my life. And I definitely don't plan on doing anything to hurt her, I really like her. There's something special about her." He knew from the moment he bumped into Lexie Grey that something was going to build between the two of them. She lit something up in him that no women had ever done before.

"Now that sounds more like Mer," Derek nodded his head, a laughing grin on his face, "Isn't this ironic though? You're my best friend...and dating my wife's sister!" After finishing his drink, he went up to order another and one for Mark. When he came back to the table, he handed one of them to his friend. "This is to you, for finding a woman that you might spend more than a few weeks together with!" They each took a sip, after clinging their bottles together.

* * *

Lexie lay in her bed that night, thoughts of the major operation running through her mind. She couldn't believe how she went from being the surgeon one day to being the patient the next. How could a simple headache turn into a deadly brain tumor? A tear fell down her cheek, she prayed desperately that her sister's husband would be able to fully remove it. She just wanted to get back to her life - be the surgeon that she was born to be and get her own place.

The door to her room slowly creaked open, revealing a very drunken Thatcher Grey. He walked unsteadily over to her; staring at the frail woman who lie in the hospital bed - his daughter, who he spent most of the time ignoring or berating. "Thought you were the doctor, Alexandra?" He snarled, the scent of alcohol was very evident in his breath. "Why the hell are you in a hospital bed? Slacking off, are you? I knew you were never good enough to be a surgeon! All that fucking money I wasted so you could go to medical school, and here you are pretending to be a patient. What the hell's wrong with you?!" He yelled loudly, not taking his angry eyes off hers the entire time. Too drunk to realize what he was even doing, Thatcher walked closer to her and slapped her cheek - so hard that it left an imprint of his hand.

Already feeling upset about her surgery, Lexie let herself cry. The long month that she had spent in the hospital, suffering through treatments, never once did her father call or come to see her. It's not like she made any attempt to let him know about her condition, because she knew he wouldn't care - he was too engulfed in drinking himself to death. Yet it still hurt to see that her own father didn't even care to find out why she hadn't been coming home. And now, that he finally did make the decision to see her, he's drunk as a skunk and thinks that she's pretending. That made it all feel even worse; she held her cheek in pain and glanced up at him, "I'm sick, dad, really sick. This isn't pretend - I have a serious brain tumor and my sister's husband is performing surgery to try and remove it tomorrow. There's no way in hell that I'd ever make this up, why would I want to suffer?! Or want to pretend to suffer?! Do you think I'm an idiot or something? You think I want to have a fucking brain tumor, dad?!" The tears dissolve into anger as she glares at the man in front of her - the man she used to think of as her father, her dad. Now, she didn't think he had the right to consider himself her father. What kind of father lays a hand on their own daughter? Or accuses their daughter of pretending to be sick?

"You watch your damn mouth, Alexandra!" Mr. Grey seethes, bringing his hand up to slap her once more. "I don't give a shit what you have; that doesn't give you the right to talk to me - _your father_ \- like that! You know none of these doctors here know what they're doing! You're going to die, just like your mother did because these fucking morons can't do their damn jobs! They killed your mother, and now they'll kill you. And I don't really care. You're an awful daughter, unlike your sister Molly. Molly's the good one - she's got a real job, a husband, and a baby. You, you're just an amateur doctor - you will never amount to anything, so it's good you'll be gone soon. One less burden in the world!"

Since the door had still be open, as Thatcher was too intoxicated to remember to close it, everyone heard what was being said. Many were appalled at what they were hearing, including Mark Sloan. He quickly made his way into the room, irate to hear the awful things being said to Lexie Grey - one of the kindest persons he had ever met. "You need to leave, sir. We don't allow yelling in any of our patients' hospital rooms. If you have a problem, you can take it up with the chief. But you're not staying in here and making this poor woman feel any worse! She's got a brain tumor, for crying out loud, there's no reason for you to be yelling bloody murder at her," His voice stern and filled with anger, he harshly yanked him away from her bedside and threw him out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Even though the dark-haired woman was still quite upset, her heart melted when she watched Mark defend her. No one ever defended her in front of her father, and that act alone made her fall for him even more. "You-You didn't have to do that," she whispered, looking up at him with her eyes in tears. A thankful smile spread across her cheeks - this man was one of the nicest she had ever met. First he invited her to sit with him at lunch, than helped her when she was in severe pain, and now he just defended her to her own father. She'd be insane _not_ to have feelings for such a person.

Mark can't help but smile back, walking over to her and wrapping her in a loving embrace. He stroked her cheek tenderly with his thumb, "I wasn't about to stand there and let your father insult you like that! For Christ's sake, you've be in the hospital for a while now, suffering majorly, and he has the nerve to treat you like that!? He thinks he can just come here and hurt you?! Some father he is." He shakes his head, holding her tighter. It never felt so natural holding another woman in his arms as it did Lexie. He ran his hand gently through her long, brown hair. "Anyway, how are you feeling? Nervous for tomorrow, Lex?"

Lexie lets herself snuggle into his embrace - it makes her feel safe and protected. "Leaning more towards scared than nervous," she admits, holding onto him tight. She hoped that this operation would be a success, she couldn't face losing her life. Not now when things seemed to finally be getting better for her. She had a great relationship with Meredith, a building one with Mark - she didn't want all of that to be taken away.

"Scared? Why are you scared, Lexie?" He strokes her back gently, pulling her closer as he peers lovingly into her brown eyes, "Don't be, you will be fine! Derek won't let anything happen to you; he's the best neurosurgeon in the country and he's Meredith's husband. So he has no choice but to get the entire tumor outta your brain!" Mark gives her a reassuring smile, then cups her face in his hands and presses a warm kiss to her lips.

She kisses him gently back, but then looks up at him with tears in her eyes. Lexie can't stop her mind from running through the _'What if's'_. There's a possibility that the operation won't work - that she'll be left with a tumor until she dies from it's uncontrollable growth. Or that she might even die _during_ the surgery. "What if it doesn't work, though? What if he goes in and the tumor hasn't shrunk? What if I don't wake up after it's done?! My sister would have to make the hardest decision of her life... I think I need to postpone this, I'm not ready. I can't go through with this!" She feels her body shake as she sobs loudly. It's all becoming too real for her, and too fast. This was easier when it was all just a thought rather than a painful event that would be happening to her in less than twenty-four hours.

The fear he hears in Lexie's small voice brings tears to his own eyes. Holding her tighter, Mark lays her against his chest and wraps one of the blankets around them. "Oh, Lexie... You're not going to die, I promise. You'll be fine, sweetie," He whispers gently into her ear, rubbing her back to soothe her. Truthfully, he has no clue if what he's saying is true. Tumors alone are complicated - tumors in the brain are a whole new level of complicated. But he knows Derek is the best surgeon there is and that he will do everything in his power to save Lexie Grey.

* * *

Meredith gets herself a coffee the next morning, trying not think about her sister's operation that's coming up in a few hours. She can't stand the thought of her going under the knife, especially with her husband as the surgeon. It's not that she hadn't trust her husband to do the best that he could, it's that she didn't know if she could trust her sister to stay away from the light. She sighed, and with her coffee in hand, she hurried to see Lexie. She had been given the day off to spend it with her sister, and that's what she intended to do - until she was being wheeled off to the OR.

When she finally got to her room and quietly let herself in, she saw Lexie sitting up in the chair. There were noticeable tear-stains on her face, and a dull expression as she stared blankly ahead. "Lexie? You okay, Lex? What's the matter?" She frantically questioned, hurrying to her side and looking at her with deep concern. She placed her hand onto the other's cheek, stroking it softly. "Look at me - talk to me, Lex! What's wrong?"

Hearing someone talk brought Lexie out of the daze she was in. She turned her head to stare into the worried eyes of her sister, and felt tears form in her eyes. "I - there-there's something weird going on with me... I - I keep having these v-visions," she speaks quietly, a slight tremor noticeable in her hands. "My mom, she keeps talking to me, Mer. She was sitting on my bed before you came in here. Meredith, my mom has been dead for five years! Why am I seeing my mom?! Oh my God I'm gonna die, aren't I? The surgery is going to kill me, I can't do it! I'm not ready to die, Mer..." She looks at her, fear and a tiredness in her eyes.

The older woman feels her heart break as she quickly scoops her distraught sister into her arms, rocking her gently. She strokes her hair while peering down into her eyes, "You're not dying, Lex," she soothes into her ear, kissing the top of her head. "You're just scared, and seeing your mom - that's probably to comfort you. It's her way of telling you that everything is going to be fine. And that's true because everything _will_ be fine! You will get through this surgery, and you will be tumor free." She keeps her voice strong and optimistic for her sister, because she knows that's the only way she'll get through it. "And when you wake up, I will be right there to take care of you. I promise, sweetie. I love you so much; I won't leave your side."

Lexie instantly feels much calmer in her sister's embrace, her eyes droop shut as she snuggles closer. "I love you too, Mer," she mutters tiredly, grabbing her hand and squeezing it, "You're the best sister I could have ever asked for; you mean the world to me." She soon drifts to sleep, holding Meredith's hand tightly in her own.

A tear runs down Meredith's cheek as she holds her sister close. She can't believe how much her sister still admires her - after the hell she put her through when they first met. She spent a whole year hating and ignoring her, yet here she is continuing to want Meredith's approval. That only makes her cry more as she gently the sleeping woman's head against her chest and kisses her head soothingly, "You are the sweetest sister there is, Lex. I'm the one who has the best sister - you've never once hated me even when I did you - all you wanted was for us to get to know each other, and what did I do? I ignored you, pushed you away, and made you feel like shit. I'm so sorry, Lex, so sorry for what I did to you and I swear to God that I will make it up to you. I will be the older sister that you need and deserve. You mean everything to me, sweetie." She says warmly into her ear, stroking her hair before drifting to sleep as well.

* * *

A half hour before Lexie's operation was due to start, Doctor Shepherd came into her room to get her. She looked up at him and felt her eyes water. This was it, she thought, it was really happening. "Is it too late to change my mind?" She innocently asks, but wishes she _could_ change her mind - she hated the thought of her brain getting cut into.

"Unfortunately," Derek gently responds, a sad smile on his face. He's always enjoyed getting to save his patients lives, but this was different. This time he had to operate on his sister-in-law, and that made his nerves run high. He wants to do everything he can to save this woman - to scrape the entire tumor away from her brain. "It's about time to get you to the OR, Lexie." He states, moving towards the back of the bed so that he can wheel it out.

Meredith looks over at her husband, who's dressed in his dark-blue scrubs with his lighthouse cap already covering his head, and is silently pleading him to save her sister's life. She then glances down at Lexie, stroking her forehead in a mother-like manner. "You will be just fine, Lex," she kisses her head, smiling reassuringly at her, "And whatever you see, stay away from the light! I love you so much; I'll see you when you wake up, sweetie." The dark blonde woman wraps her in one last, tight, embrace while patting her head softly. Then she peers up at Derek, her expression toughens, "You better take good care of my sister, Shepherd - She better be tumor free when she wakes up!"

* * *

Once in the operating room, Lexie lies on the table - looking up at the ceiling as she thinks about how much her life has changed in the past year. She went from being a medical student, to an intern, and now to a patient - laying on the very operating table that she had seen many other patients lay on, ones that she had helped in performing their surgeries. She feels tears come pouring out of her eyes - realizing that this is what her patients faced everyday. They faced the possibility of each day being their last as does Lexie now while she lay against the cold OR table.

Doctor Shepherd finally walked in the room, after scrubbing in, and stood by where her head lay. Empathy was in his eyes as he stared down into her brown ones, "I'm going to do everything that I can to get this tumor out of you. I promise, Lexie." He usually waited until his patients were already asleep to come in, but this was different - Lexie wasn't just any patient, she was his wife's sister. And he couldn't let her lay there alone as she cry until the drug took over and lured her into a deep sleep. So gently, he placed a hand on her forehead and stroked it soothingly as he turned his eyes towards the anesthesiologist and silently motioned for him to start administering the medication. "You will be okay, Lexie. I'll take good care of you, and when you wake up there will be no more tumor. Now I need you to count to ten for me, think you can do that?" Derek strokes her forehead comfortingly, looking softly into her tired eyes.

Lexie can feel the anesthetic starting to work as her body becomes heavier, her eyes too tired to keep open, but she nods and begins to count. "Mmm one, two, nnn-uh three, fo-," Her eyes roll to the back and close as sleep quickly overcomes her. Once she's asleep, Doctor Shepherd stands up and gets to work at shaving the long hair from her head, along with the help of a few OR nurses, so that he's able to get a better look into her brain.

It takes about two hours before he can finally have a look at the nasty tumor that's been reaking havoc on Lexie's life for the past year, and when he sees it, he sighs. The tumor appeared to not have shrunk at all, infact it seemed to have taken over her entire brain. He knew this wasn't going to be an easy surgery, and now it would be much harder. He'd be lucky if he could get even a quarter of the tumor removed without damaging anything serious. He would have to put her on a stronger treatment plan, because radiation alone wasn't helping - she would need to indoor chemotherapy along with it, if there was any chance of getting the tumor to shrink.

* * *

Waiting makes Meredith restless. She can't sit still for longer than a few minutes; she paces the room anxiously. She hopes that the tumor is tiny enough to be removed - she doesn't want to watch her sister suffer anymore, nor does she want to lose her. Aggravated from not knowing what's going on, Meredith decides to go down and sneak in the gallery. She doesn't care that the chief had warned her that she hadn't the right to set foot in there - since it was someone close to her, she couldn't go anywhere near the OR. She just kept on walking down the corridor; her patience has run out, she's going to find out what's happening with her sister's surgery.

"Mer, didn't Weber give you the day off?" Cristina Yang catches up to her, giving her a look - one that resembles sympathy but not quite so. "You're not going to Shepherd's OR, are you? Oh who am I kidding, of course that's where you're going. You know that's not allowed, right? He's operating on your sister, you can't watch that." Comforting people is not one of Doctor Yang's strong suits, and even when she tries to, she fails miserably.

Meredith shakes her head, fastening her pace. She knows she's not allowed but that doesn't mean she won't do it anyway. If no one is going to update her on the surgery, then she'll do it herself. She needs to know how her sister is, if the tumor can be removed. "Allowed or not, I'm going anyway," she finally says, staring at her best friend - _her_ person, "I know you don't have a sister, Cristina, but if you did then you would understand this. You would understand why I need to go watch my sister's operation, why I need to make sure that my husband does everything he can to save my little sister. I've made her life hell from the day I met her, and now she might be dying! I don't want her to die; but God-forbid this be her last day, I need to be there for her. Even if it's just sitting in the gallery, I need to be there with Lexie. She's alone and scared - and unconscious on a table, she needs someone to be there for her - Someone who loves her and will make her feel like everything is okay. So I don't care what you or Weber, _or anyone_ , says, I am going into that OR and staying with my sister."

* * *

Quietly, Meredith makes her way into the OR gallery and sits in one of the empty seats. She looks down at her sister, lying motionless on the table, and her husband stands over her - focusing deeply on the brain in front his eyes. She lets tears run down her cheeks as she thinks of how awful this past month has been for Lexie. One of the most loving and caring women there is, her sweet sister Lexie, and she's been dealt an unimaginable amount of pain. It rips at her heart every time she thinks about it - seeing her suffer in silence, having her life pulled from right under her. "I'm here, Lexie, I'm here. No matter what the outcome is, I will be right here. Just - whatever you do, whatever you see - please stay away from the light," she gently whispers, squeezing her eyes shut.

Mark Sloan notices her and goes over to sit beside her. He places a hand on her shoulder, to try and comfort her. "I know I'm probably the last person you wanna see; but Lexie is so strong, she will survive this. And Derek - he is _great_ at what he does, he will take care of her. It's going to be okay, Meredith. She _will_ be okay, because she has you to help her through this." He pats her shoulder and is suprised when she leans her head on _his_ shoulder, crying her eyes out. Sympathy rises as he wraps her in comforting hug, stroking her hair gently. "You should sleep a bit, it's gonna be a while before he's done. Nothing's going to change, if you sleep or not, so just close your eyes. I'll wake you when it's over," he whispers kindly, staring ahead through the glass window that seperates them from Doctor Shepherd and Lexie Grey. He silently prays, hoping for a miracle to save the woman's life - the woman who he has fallen deeply in love with _and_ the woman who Meredith so desperately needs to survive.


	3. Chapter 3

Lexie slowly opens her eyes but closes them quickly once the light hits them. An intense wave of pain tears through her head as she lay in the hospital bed. Confused at the pain she's feeling, she forces her eyes to open again and glances around the room. Meredith is hovering over her, continuously stroking her hair and giving her looks of sympathy. In the chair beside the bed sits Mark Sloan, who's also giving her that same sympathetic look. And standing at the end of the bed is Doctor Shepherd, his deep blue eyes staring down at her in sympathy as well.

"What - What's going on? Why are you all staring at me like that?" The brunette worriedly asks, not understanding what's happening to her. Another strong pain wipes through her, she squeezes her eyes shut until it finally passes. The pain comes as shock to her, she can't exactly remember why she's in the hospital or what's the matter with her head. "Did I fall and hit my head? It really hurts."

Hearing how confused her sister was, Meredith began to worry even deeper for her. She gently bends down to press a soothing kiss to her forehead while grabbing a hold of one of her hands, "Lex, you just had a major brain operation. That's why your head hurts so terribly." Stroking her sister's hand, she stares over at her husband - not wanting to be the bearer of bad news. She couldn't be the one to tell Lexie how close to death she was.

Doctor Shepherd gave a quick glance to his wife before turning to face Lexie - his face showing the outmost sympathy. He absolutely loathed telling his patients bad news, even more so to his own sister-in-law. Taking a deep breath he opened his mouth to speak, "Well, unfortunately, the surgery did not go as planned. It turns out your tumor is even bigger than what the scans were showing - it takes up your entire brain, almost. I'm so sorry Lexie - I really thought I'd be able to get it all out, but it's just too big. And I didn't want to risk causing any permanent damage; so what we're going to do now is add a dose of chemotherapy to your treatment along with continuing the radiation. We'll give that a few weeks before we go back in and try to remove it."

The dark haired woman scrunched her face up in confusion. What on earth was all this talk about brain surgery and tumors? Lexie Grey surely didn't have a brain tumor. She would be the first to know if she did. Shaking her head, she looked from her sister to Derek, "What the hell are you guys talking about? I think I would know if I had a brain tumor - and I sure as hell don't remember having an operation." Just the thought of having cancer makes her feel uncomfortable - she couldn't end up gravely ill when she only began her first year as a surgical intern.

Meredith's worry grows as she peers over at Derek. Why is her sister not able to remember that she's sick with cancer? Had her husband permanently damage a part of her brain? She hopes whatever the problem is that it's only a temporary thing or if it's not that Derek can somehow fix it. "Derek - can I talk to you out in the hall for a minute?" Her voice is a bit shaky as she gently bends down to kiss Lexie's forehead. After, she quickly walks out of the room and yanks her husband with her.

She closes the door so that Lexie can't hear their conversation. Her blue eyes are filled with a deep concern as she stares up at her husband - desperate to know exactly what's going on with her sister. "Tell me what's wrong with Lex - why is she having memory troubles? Did you damage part of her brain?" Meredith pleadingly looks into his eyes - anxiously waiting to hear what's caused this to happen.

"Nice to know that my own wife thinks poorly of my surgical skills," Derek lightly starts, but quickly turns his tone to a more serious one as he pulls his wife in for a comforting embrace, "No I didn't do a thing to damage her brain - the tumor was a lot bigger than what I saw on the scans. And that complicated her surgery immensely. I could only remove a small portion of the tumor, and I'm going to have to go back in to get the rest once we can get it to shrink some more. The tumor is most likely causing her memory loss along with the fact that she's still coming out of the anesthesia. I'm sure once that wears off, she'll be a little more herself. For right now, we'll just have to wait and see how she does. Don't push her, Mer - she'll remember what she can."

* * *

Hours pass and Lexie was getting tired of lying around in the bed all day. She swung her legs over to the floor but once she stood up, a strong wave of nausea hit her. A sharp pain ran through her head, having her double over with her hands covering her mouth. The worst combination of symptoms she's ever experienced. And of course she just happens to be alone during it - Meredith had to run Zola to daycare and Mark was called in for an emergency surgery.

In pain and alone, Lexie forced herself to stand up. She grabbed her IV pole to help steady herself, carefully making her way into the bathroom. Turning the faucet on she lets the water heat up some before splashing it onto her face. The heat of the water seems to calm her nausea, but does nothing to take away the stabbing pain she's experiencing. It's so intense that all she can do is stand there - she feels as if she's being consumed by it. If she even tries to take one step forward the stabbing sensation gets stronger.

The sound of her room's door opening brings a feeling of relief to Lexie. Someone is here and can help her get back to the bed. She tries to move closer to the doorway of the bathroom but the pain intensifies and she ends up falling to the ground with a loud yelp. A sob escapes her as she clutches her head with her hands, hoping to somehow stop the pain. She feels as if someone's sliced into her scalp and ripped the skin off, layer by layer. Total agony is what she's in right now.

Fortunately Lexie's cries were heard and in came a very worried Meredith. She knelt down beside the clearly hurting brunette, gently scooping her into her arms. "Lex, what were you doing out of bed? You can't be getting out of it without someone here to help you - you just had major brain surgery!" Meredith exclaims, her tone full of concern for her younger sister. She carefully carries her back to the bed, laying her back in it and kissing her forehead softly. Sadly she stares down at her while anxiously waiting for her to answer.

"I - wait, why are you being nice to me? Last time we talked, you said you rather ignore me and pretend I don't exist. So why have things suddenly changed?" Lexie has to squeeze her eyes shut to help ease the pain. Yet, she's also surprised to see that her half-sister is actually interested in her well being - the last thing she remembers was being told how unwanted she was in Meredith's life. So to have her here now utterly confused her.

Meredith's blue eyes fill with empathy as she bends down to gently caress the younger woman's cheek. It breaks her heart that her sister has to deal with memory loss on top of her fatal disease. "We made up a while ago, Lex. You just can't remember right now because of the operation," she softly says, running a hand through her sister's long hair. She wishes there was some way to bring back those precious memories the two made, but she knew there was nothing else to do except wait and see. "I love you so much, Lex, and I'm sorry for being such a terrible sister to you. But I'm here now and I won't leave you, I mean that."

Wide eyes, Lexie's expression turns into one of confusion. It makes her mad to know that she can't remember so many important things that have been going on in her life. She stares up at Meredith, searching her face for any hints of lies but all that showed was sincerity. "I just - I want to remember. I don't get it - any of this, why do I have brain cancer? And you're acting like a real sister now...And apparently Mark Sloan is in love with me! Why am I not able to remember any of it?! All these wonderful things - not the cancer part - are happening and I can't even remember that." She speaks, her tone a bit edgy as she hits her hand against the side of her bed.

To see her sister angry, the dirty-blonde doctor sits beside her and gently grabs her hand. She strokes the hand softly with her thumb, tracing circles around it. "Calm down, Lexie. It's only temporary the memory loss - you'll remember again soon. Why don't you try to sleep? You look exhausted, sweetie, and it's only been a few hours since your surgery," she lovingly strokes her sister's hair, giving a soothing kiss to her head.

* * *

It's nearly six in the evening when Lexie wakes up again. This time her head seems to be working a bit better and her memories aren't as fuzzy. She glances around the room and sees her sister asleep in the chair - she smiles to herself. It warms her heart at how much her older sister cares for her and how their relationship only continues to grow more and more every day. Having her sister with her during such a rough time in her life really helps her to cope.

Several minutes later Meredith's eyes pop open and she immediately stares over at Lexie. She gets up from the chair and rushes to her side, gently wrapping her in a hug. "Sleep well, Lex?" She asks, her eyes worriedly glancing down at the brunette woman. Seeing some color back in Lexie's face definitely brings a bout of relief to her.

A smile appears on the other's face as she slowly nods her head. "Did he get the entire tumor out?" Lexie asks in an innocent tone - so innocent that it causes a tiny pang in Meredith's heart. She watches the expression on her older sister's face, trying to decipher what she might be hiding. She hopes to hear good news - to hear that Doctor Shepherd was able to entirely remove the tumor, that she would live out her life cancer free.

"You remember?" Meredith happily asks, smiling sadly at the younger woman when she nods her head. Sighing, she presses a motherly kiss to her cheek while stroking soft circles around her back. It pained her to have to ruin Lexie's mood by telling her how deadly the tumor is and how much suffering she has yet to do. "Well, Lex...Derek wasn't able to remove all of it - when he went in, the tumor seemed to take up your entire brain. He said that your treatment will have to be changed in order to aggressively shrink this tumor - he's gonna put you on chemotherapy along with the radiation. After a couple weeks of that, he's going to go back in and hopefully he'll be able to remove the entire thing. I'm so sorry, Lex - I know this isn't the news you wanted to hear, I hate having to tell you this. But I promise you - we will not stop until that tumor is gone. You will not die, Lexie."

Tears replaced the smile as Lexie digested the terrible news. Her heart felt heavy at the realization that she may not survive - her tumor is even worse than she and everyone else thought, the scans had deceived them all. The room began to spin as she try to thing of how to respond. She exhaustedly looked up at her sister, eyes filled with an unusual darkness. "I don't - I don't want chemotherapy. That stuff is brutal, please don't make go through that. If radiation hasn't worked, why would that work? This tumor is gonna be the death of me, Mer...And I - I don't want to die," Lexie cries out, hopelessly reaching out for her older sister.

Meredith quickly scoops the distraught woman into her arms, feeling her own eyes water with tears. She gently lays Lexie's head against her chest while running her hand up and down her back, in an effort to soothe her. "You're not dying, Lex! You're gonna be fine, I promise. But you have to have the chemotherapy - that's the only way to shrink this tumor. I know it's going to make you feel worse, but I'll be here to help you through it and I'm sure Mark will be as well. We'll take care of you, sweetie," she softly says, kissing the top of Lexie's head while giving her a reassuring smile. "How about we go for a short walk? Need to keep you from getting blood clots, Lex."

Slowly nodding and wiping at her tears, Lexie tries to stand up but the minute she does a sharp pain rips through her body. She has to hold onto Meredith in order to steady herself. Feeling the older woman's envelope around her, she relaxes and can feel the pain start to subside some. She lifts her head to stare up at her sister, "I love you - you're such a great sister, Mer." She wraps her own arms around the dark blonde in a comforting embrace. Having her sister there during such a tragic time makes all the difference.

* * *

Meredith gently and slowly guided Lexie down the hall. She had one arm wrapped around her shoulder - to keep her from falling - and the other arm she used to pull her sister's IV pole, not wanting her to have to worry about such a heavy thing. Since she felt the brunette to be doing so well she decided to extend their walk down to the cafeteria. It was only another hallway away so she figured that shouldn't be too hard or painful for the woman.

Once they made it into the cafeteria, Meredith found a table and carefully helped Lexie to sit down - who was pale and clearly out of breath at this point. She gently kissed the top of her head, stroking her hair softly, "Deep breaths, Lex. I'm gonna go get you a water, you need to sit for a while. I think I may have pushed you a little too much today - I'm sorry! I'll be right back, just relax." She quickly hurries to the line to purchase a bottle of water for her sister.

While Lexie sits alone, waiting for her sister to come back, she sees Mark coming over to the table. A smile lights up her face as he takes a seat beside her, pulling her into his strong arms. She looks up at him, her brown eyes sparkling, and wraps her arms around his neck. "You're Mark Sloan," she gently says, stroking his cheek with her knuckles. "My memory's back." Smiling, she cups the cheeks that she'd been stroking and plants a tender kiss to his lips.

Mark pulls her closer, gently stroking her back. "Glad to hear it, Lexie! But let's take things slow, today's only the first day after a major brain operation. You need to be careful, sweetie," he firmly says, yet a loving expression on his face as he stares into her eyes. He holds her close, inwardly exploding with joy at the fact that she remembers him. He lovingly kisses the top of her head right as Meredith comes back to the table, causing him to mentally slap himself.

"Ah I see you've got yourself a visitor, Lex," Meredith says in a bit of a sour tone as she hands the brunette her water. She sits down across from the two, giving a sharp stare to Doctor Sloan. Even though she had already made it very clear to him not to hurt her sister, she still wasn't too fond of him hanging all over her. She knew that she shouldn't be that way - especially since Mark seems to make Lexie happy - but she still can only think of him as the 'Manwhore' who sleeps around with whatever women he can find. "Lexie's already exhausted from the walk, so don't tire her out anymore, Sloan."

Lexie could feel her cheeks flush red as she goes to take a sip of the water, which felt great on her throat - she hadn't had anything to drink in over twelve hours. She looks over at her sister, sighing, "Mer, he's not gonna do anything. Please be civil; he's not a bad person." The brunette pleads, staring warmly into her older sister's blue eyes. When she sees the other slightly shrug and give her a half-smile, she smiles as well.

Feeling a bit awkward, Mark gets up to leave, "It's fine, Lexie. I gotta get back to work anyway, I just thought to check on you - I'm happy your memory's back, that's wonderful. I'll drop by your room tomorrow afternoon, my schedules not too crazy tomorrow so we can spend a bit more time together." He gently presses a kiss to Lexie's lips, stroking her hair lovingly. "I love you, Lex," he whispers so only she can hear, smiling warmly. Once he releases her, he gives a small wave to Meredith - who's staring daggers at him - and then he quickly heads back to work.

Sighing and left with a tingly sensation, Lexie stares over at the dirty-blonde. A glowing smile is on her face - her body feels warm all over, and she knows that's because of Mark. He always makes her feel so warm and fuzzy inside; he makes her forget about the agonizing pain she's in. "Hey Mer? Can I ask you something?" She takes another sip of the water in front of her, not taking her eyes off of her sister.

Seeing how happy her sister is, Meredith finds herself smiling as well. She nods, "Of course you can, sweetie." She peers lovingly over at Lexie, who seems to be glowing from how ecstatic she is. And seeing that makes her realize that Mark is the reason for it - he is the one to make her younger sister light up, even in her most vulnerable time.

"How did you know you were in love with Derek?" Lexie asks, looking curiously at the older woman. She's never really dated before, and her mother passed away before she could even talk to her about what it's like to be in love. And obviously her father would be of no help in such a situation - he's too occupied drinking himself to death. So what better than to ask her older sister, who happens to be married?

Meredith laughs slightly, not too shocked by the question. And thinking back on how she met her husband, she can't help but laugh even more. "Well, I don't know - he just, every time I looked at him I could feel my heart beating faster. And no matter how many times we pushed each other away, we always wound up back together - which to me means that he's my soulmate and I am destined to be with him," she smiles, happy at the way her life turned out. She had a wonderful, loving husband, a beautiful daughter, and of course, she had Lexie.

The brunette nods, and realizes that she might be falling in love with Mark Sloan. Every time she's with him, her body becomes warm and tingly - her heart swells with love when she's near him. Dreamily sighing, she looks back up at her sister and smiles, "I think I may be in love with Mark."

* * *

That night Lexie lay in the bed unable to fall asleep. She stares up at the ceiling, worried about what tomorrow will bring. Just an hour ago, Derek Shepherd had told her that she'd be starting her first round of chemotherapy in the morning and she couldn't be any more nervous for it. It scared her to realize that not only will radiation be put through her body, but now so will poison. And it's not as if that was a guarantee to work. Her tumor could still be the size it is now in two weeks. If that's the case then her chances of surviving are slim to none.

She closes her eyes in an effort to allow sleep to overcome her, but it doesn't. Frustrated she lets out a loud grunt. Before Lexie can do anything else, she sees the door slowly open and in comes her sister. She smiles softly, at least someone will be here to keep her company during an episode of insomnia. "What're you doing here so late, Mer?" The brunette gently questions, but is beyond thankful to have her sister there with her.

Closing the door behind her, Meredith slowly approaches her sister's bed and softly looks down at her. She reaches down to lovingly stroke the other's hair, a sadness evident in her blue eyes. "Thought you could use the company, Lex. You shouldn't be alone, not your first night after such a major operation," her voice is gentle as she peers at Lexie, who can tell that there's something else that needs to be said. Sighing, the dark blonde pulls her into her arms and sits down in the chair beside the bed, "I love you so much, Lex, and I hate that I have to be the one to tell you this but I figure it might be easier coming from your sister... Derek talked to Mark earlier, and well - apparently he's been offered a position at another hospital, in New York, and he's accepted it. He said he's only taking the job because his mother lives down there and he wants to be closer to her - I'm so sorry, Lexie; I know you really like him and how happy he makes you. I'm so sorry." She hates to see the pain in her sister's eyes which only makes her hold her tighter, stroking her hair lovingly.

Lexie shakes her head furiously as tears swarm out of her eyes. Why would he take a job all the way across the country, especially after telling her that he loves her? Was that all a lie? She starts hyperventilate from how hard she's crying which causes pain to shoot through her head, and now she's holding her hands over it as she screams in agony. She felt as though her life was collapsing in on her - the one person she loved and who seemed to be the only one to help her pain will be 3,000 miles away.

"Shh, calm down Lex," Meredith softly soothes into her ear, stroking her back gently. She holds her close, rocking her back and forth in an effort to stop the pain. "It's gonna be okay, sweetie. But you have to calm down, you're gonna make yourself hurt even more," she whispers, running a gentle hand through her hair. She's angry with Mark for being the cause of the agony her sister is clearly in right now - why would he leave her, especially right after a major surgery? She shakes her head, vowing to make his life miserable up until the day he leaves for New York. "I'm here for you, Lex. I'll take care of you and help you through all of it, I promise. I love you so much - you're gonna be just fine, sweetheart." Gently, Meredith presses a kiss to the top of Lexie's head as she finally lulls her to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Mark Sloan anxiously stands outside Lexie's room - occasionally peaking in through the tiny window on the door. He knows how much trouble he's in with her older sister and is trying to brace himself for it. Whatever Meredith says or does to him, he knows that he deserves it - he's choosing to leave the woman he loves, who's suffering through cancer nonetheless, for a job in New York. There are some good reasons as to why he's chosen to accept a position so far away, though Lexie and Meredith will only see those as excuses so he will just have to keep his mouth shut.

"I wouldn't go in there if I were you, Sloan," Derek Shepherd's voice brings Mark out of his thoughts. The dark haired doctor is walking over to him, carrying Lexie's charts in his hand while a nurse follows behind him with a wheelchair. "Lexie doesn't need to deal with drama right now - it's her first day of chemotherapy. Do you really want to make today any worse for her, Mark? Besides Meredith is furious - she's ready to throw you in the river and watch the fish feed on you." He says, though gives a half sympathetic look towards him.

Sighing sadly, Mark nods his head as he slowly begins to walk away. He hates himself for hurting Lexie so much, especially at a time like this, but he had no choice - he has to go to New York and care for his mother. Giving one glance back at his best friend, he calls out, "Please tell Lexie I love her...I know she probably doesn't believe that but I do - I really do. I love Lexie with all my heart, Derek!" He's never loved a woman as much as he does Lexie Grey. Which is why he can't stand the pain he's caused her - yet he knows there's nothing he can do to change it, at least not yet.

* * *

Derek Shepherd enters Lexie's room, giving a friendly smile to both she and Meredith. "Good morning - you ready to start the chemo, Lexie?" He asks, even though he can already guess her answer. What person would be ready for such a drastic treatment? He glances over at his wife - trying to decipher how she's feeling.

Shrugging her shoulders, the brunette responds with, "Hardly - I just hope this works. I want this damn tumor gone so I can get back to my life. I should be the one performing surgeries and procedures on patients - not the one having them done." She folds her arms over her chest as she stare angrily ahead. It's not fair that she has to endure such a horrendous disease - especially when she's only at the beginning of her medical career. She'll have so much work to do when she's finally better and will have to train even longer to become the surgeon she wants to be.

Meredith and Derek share a sad look before returning their sympathetic eyes to Lexie. Meredith walks over to her sister's bedside, gently helping her out of bed and into the wheelchair that's waiting for her near the door. She looks at the nurse - who was only there to get her sister to and from her chemotherapy - and shakes her head. "You can go - I'll follow Dr. Shepherd down with her," her voice is a tad harsher than she meant, but she doesn't care too much. She spent most of the night comforting her sister over her least favorite person in the world - meaning she was functioning on only an hour or two of sleep. At this point she had no control or care over what came out of her mouth, all that concerned her was bringing as much comfort to her sister as she could.

Once Lexie's all hooked up to the medicine, she is left to sit and wait for the next few hours. She lets out a frustrated sigh, looking over at Meredith - who's sitting right beside after insisting that she's staying with her until it's finished. "What am I supposed to do for three hours? They can't expect me to sit here and twiddle my thumbs that entire time - I'll go crazy!"

Grabbing a hold of the younger woman's hand, Meredith gives it a gentle squeeze. "Lex - you're not going to want to do anything once it kicks in, believe me. You'll be too busy puking your guts out," she softly says while stroking her sister's hand tenderly in with her thumb. She gives an empathetic glance - it's so hard to see her sister like this. She wishes there was some way to make this easier for her, some way that she could rid Lexie of her pain.

* * *

Three hours pass, leaving Lexie to feel the biggest wave of nausea she's ever felt in her life. Just trying to stand up makes the sensation even worse - Meredith hands her a bucket, in which she lets it all out and hopes that that relieves some of the sickness. When she's done, the older woman carefully helps her to stand up and walk over to her wheelchair. "Well - that was horrible. I'm not doing this anymore, Mer. No way," Lexie says, tiredly leaning her head against the back of the wheelchair.

Pushing the wheelchair out of the room and in the direction of her sister's room, Meredith looks down at her with a sympathetic expression. She gently bends down to press a soothing kiss to the top of her head, "I know it's a dreadful treatment, Lex, but you have to finish it. You want that tumor gone, don't you?" Receiving a slow nod in response to her question, she sighs while using one of her hands to stroke through Lexie's soft hair. "Then you have to get the chemo - that's the only way Derek can get your tumor to shrink enough so that he can go back in and remove it all. I know it's making you feel like shit but I'm going to take care of you, Lex. You're not gonna suffer alone!" She says while gently helping Lexie over to the bed once they're back in her room.

Exhausted, Lexie happily lays her head back against her pillow. She looks up at her older sister and gives her a grateful smile, "Thanks for all your help, Mer. Means a lot to me. I think I'm gonna rest a bit though - I'm absolutely exhausted. You can leave for a bit, I'll be okay while I sleep." Her voice is barely above a whisper as her eyes droop close. Before long she drifts into a peaceful slumber.

Meredith bends down to press a soothing kiss to her sister's forehead before quietly leaving the room. She aimlessly makes her way down the hall and stops suddenly when she sees Mark Sloan leaning against the counter of the nurses station - obviously busy flirting with all the hot nurses, the only thing he's good at doing these days. Anger starting to boil, Meredith marches her way over to him - staring at him so intensely that if looks could kill, he would be dead instantly. "What the hell are you doing, Sloan? Are you really over here flirting with the nurses? While Lexie - the supposed woman that you love - is stuck lying in a hospital bed sick as a dog! Isn't it enough that you've decided to leave her to go to some new job in fucking New York?! Why would you cheat on her too? I mean I always knew you love to sleep around - but this, this is just pure heartless!" She nearly yells while slamming her fists on the top of the counter.

Everyone in the room stops what they're doing to stare at the scene that's unfolding right in front of them. Mark turns to face Meredith, not entirely surprised at the amount of harshness in her voice. He knew he deserved that - what kind of man just ups and moves away after finding out that the woman he loves is suffering with a very deadly brain tumor? "Look I know you're mad at me for having to leave your sister - and you have every right to be - but I swear to you that I'm not over here flirting. All I was doing was trying to find out how Lexie is doing after her first round of chemo. Because I know it wouldn't be a smart idea for me to go see her - I _know_ that I've hurt her! And I hate myself for having hurt her. But I have to move to New York right now - I just - I need to. That doesn't change the fact that I love your sister, I'll still love her while I'm living up there." He states, though he knows Meredith probably won't believe him or even cares what he has to say. In her eyes, he's the bad guy.

"Don't make excuses - you're being selfish and moving away for your own pleasure! This is the best teaching hospital in the country, there's no reason why you should take that job in New York. You can't commit yourself to my sister so you're taking the easy way out and moving all the way across the damn country! How low can you get, Sloan? You have a beautiful, kind woman who actually loves you - would do anything for you - and you're leaving her because you can't deal with commitment! You have no heart and you are not to go anywhere near Lexie again. I mean it - if I see you even look at her, I will kill you." Meredith seethes angrily at the man, disgusted that he would cause so much pain to her younger sister - especially when she's suffering with such a terminal brain tumor. With one last glare at him, the dark-blonde surgeon continues her way down the hall and hopes the long walk will clear her mind.

* * *

Meredith gets herself a much needed coffee from the cafeteria, then sits down at a vacant table near the window. She needs time to think before going back to her younger sister. As she sits silently sipping on her coffee, she doesn't even notice her husband's presence until she hears him speak. Looking up to meet his eyes, a soft smile spreads across her face. "Didn't even see you sit down," she says, "On a break or something?"

Reaching over the table, Derek grabs a hold of her hands and strokes them lovingly with his thumb. "I am, actually. Thought I'd come have a coffee with my wife - How are you doing? I heard you had a little yelling match with Sloan. That's all the interns are blabbing about now!" He can't help the small chuckle that escapes - he knew how much Meredith despised his best friend and wasn't too surprised to hear what happened between the two.

With a sigh, the dark-blonde woman nods her head. She couldn't stand Mark for the tremendous amount of pain he caused to Lexie - her sister, and one of the sweetest people in the world. And she certainly wasn't going to let him leave without getting a few harsh words in. "I saw him standing over the nurses station - seeming to be having a good ole' time chatting away with them! That infuriated me to see him doing that after already breaking my sister's heart by suddenly deciding to move to New York! And then he tries to defend himself by making up some lame excuse 'oh I was just trying to find out how Lexie was doing'...Fucking bullshit, he just didn't want to get caught flirting with other women. The only thing he's good at! He makes me sick and if I ever see him near Lex again - he's a dead man," her tone cold as she stares sternly into her husband's sympathetic blue eyes.

"I don't understand why he's just - out of nowhere - decided to take a job in New York... Especially at a time like this, he said Lexie's the first woman he's ever really loved and he could see himself spending a long time with her. Mark Sloan has never said anything like that to me before so there's not a doubt in my mind that he really does love Lexie. Which makes it even harder for me to understand why the sudden urge for him to move half-way across the country. There must be a good reason for this otherwise he wouldn't go - not when the love of his life is suffering with brain cancer. He just won't tell us because he assumes we'll dismiss it as an excuse." Derek takes a sip of his coffee and shakes his head. He knows his best friend truly meant that he loves Lexie Grey - this is the first time he's been in a serious relationship and Derek can feel the sincerity in Mark Sloan's words. There just has to be a bigger reason for his sudden choice to move. There's no way he would willingly leave his wife's sister - not if he loved her as much as he says.

* * *

That evening, Meredith decides to take Lexie out of her room for a bit - to keep her from getting too stir crazy. She wraps an arm around the brunette's shoulder to give her extra support as they slowly walk down the hallway. After a few hours of feeling deathly ill, Lexie's symptoms slowly faded away. Leaving her bored out of her mind so taking a walk with her older sister sounded absolutely perfect to her. A smile displayed on her face, she happily stared up at Meredith, "Can we go to the little coffee shop on the third floor? I need some caffeine and they make the best damn coffee in here." Her brown eyes innocently beam at the older woman.

Shaking her head with a laugh, Meredith switches their direction towards the elevators. To see her sister smile through such a hard time in her life, it made her heart swell with unimaginable love and admiration for her. "We can do whatever makes you happy, Lex," she replies as they get onto the elevator. She presses the floor number and waits patiently with her younger sister beside her.

Once the two have ordered and received their coffees - Lexie, a large Cinnamon Latte and Meredith, an extra bold French Roast - they have a seat at one of the circular tables. Lexie has a sip of latte, staring across at the other. "You've been such a wonderful sister to me these last couple of months - that means so much to me. I love you, Mer," she reaches to take one of her sister's hands and squeezes it softly in her own.

Though before Meredith can say anyting in response, a loud crash is heard. The two women turn to see what could have caused such a noise and are shocked when they see an obviously intoxicated man. The man isn't just any man - it turns out to be Thatcher Grey, the man who was reason that Meredith and Lexie are deemed half-sisters. Not sure what she should do, she stares at the younger woman and notices just how terrified she is. She focuses back on Thatcher, who slowly stands up and starts making his way over to them - seemingly not able to walk in straight line.

"What are you still doing in the hospital, Lexie?" Thatcher slurrs angrily, his blood-shot eyes glaring straight into her terrified ones. He looks over at Meredith and shakes his head, "You've surely grown into a lovely young woman, Meredith. Unlike your little sister here! She's faking this illness - you see - and abandoning her own father! Isn't that just disgusting?" He gets closer to Lexie - his eyes dark with rage. But before he can do anything to her, he falls to the ground and blood comes rushing out of his mouth.

Lexie sits in her seat unable to move or do anything. Her body feels paralyzed as she watches the scene in front of her - her brown eyes wide and terrified. She doesn't know whether to cry or feel relieved that her father didn't have the chance to slap her. She doesn't know if she wants to help him or let him suffer - let him suffer as much as she's suffered watching him drink himself to a point like this.

Tears start to fall from her eyes and fast. She stands up from her chair - watching in horror as a swarm of doctor's surround her father, trying to revive him. She feels her body being engulfed in a strong pair of arms and her eyesight becomes muffled as the hair of her sister covers her eyes. More tears pour out of her eyes as she allows a few sobs to escape causing her body to shake with them.

Meredith holds the younger woman close and starts walking as far away from that room as possible. She can't let her sister witness that horrific scene - she can't let her watch her own father die. She runs her hand comfortingly through her hair as she enters the elevator with her. A few minutes later - when they finally make it back into Lexie's room - she sits down in the chair, holding the emotional brunette tight in her arms. "It's okay, Lexie...Everything's gonna be okay!" She soothes into her ear, pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head.

Shaking her head angrily as she sob, Lexie looks up at her sister. "It's my fault if he dies - I should have forced him to go to rehab or something... I knew he had a problem and I fucking ignored it! I can't - I can't live with myself if he dies...I could have prevented this from happening! My mom would be so disappointed in me for letting him drink himself to death. She would absolutely hate me for what I've done," her voice breaks with the amount of pain she's feeling. She should have done something to get him help - she should have done something.

Hearing her sister put the blame on herself makes a rage build inside Meredith. She holds her tighter, stroking her hair over and over in an effort to calm her down. "No, Lexie - this is all on Thatcher. He's a grown ass man, he can make his own damn decisions. He chose to drink himself to this point and if he dies, it's his own fault. You did nothing wrong and I better not hear another word about it! You don't need to be worrying about this - you have your own problems to deal with. You're more important," she speaks firmly - laying the brunette's head against her chest as she continues to comfort her. "Close your eyes and rest, Lex. I'll wake you up if I hear anything about him. You need your energy though - so you need to get some sleep, sweetie."

* * *

It's nearly midnight when the door of Lexie's room slowly opens. Meredith glances over and sees that it's Derek - his eyes seeming somber and empathetic. She lets out a sigh, knowing he's about to tell them the bad news - the bad news that Thatcher's - "Well, Thatcher's alive...He's in the ICU but he's doing okay, I heard. Guess all that alcohol consumption has finally caught up to him, he's in desperate need of a liver transplant. But with the rule that he has to be sober for a year before being placed on the transplant list, he'll probably be gone before that happens." His voice deadpanned as he says this - he never really cared for Thatcher, not after he left his wife in the dust and barely took any better care of her sister.

Meredith shrugs her shoulders, still holding a sleeping Lexie close in her arms. She softly runs her hand through the small amount of hair that her sister has left while staring up at her husband. "Guess he should have taken better care of himself. He better not even think of asking Lexie for any part of her liver because she will not be donating. Over my dead body will she! And I'm sure as hell not giving him mine either. He did this to himself and now he has to live with the consequences. It's his turn to suffer - the same way he made poor Lexie suffer as she watched him drink himself to death. He deserves whatever he gets! And don't even tell Lexie about his needing a liver - she doesn't need to fucking stress over it, it's not her problem. She has enough to worry about with her brain tumor - she doesn't need this added to the list," she looks sadly down at the brunette. It makes her heart ache at how much her sister's had to suffer with and is suffering with now. Pressing a comforting kiss to her forehead, Meredith rocks her gently in her arms. She will do whatever she has to do to protect her sister - even if she has to lie about the severity of their father's illness.


End file.
